The long drive home from visiting my parents over the holidays gave me too much time to think and feel. As usual my feelings were sad over the situation between us. We live together so well as roommates, except for the fact that I love you and you don't feel the same about me. At our best times together I feel such a connection, a bond, a wonderful flow of energy between us. That you haven't felt it, from my perspective, is as if you hung one of your arms at your side and said it didn't exist. Intellectually your position was irreproachable -- you couldn't create what wasn't there. But my heart could not accept that this was true, believing that there were at least parts of you that cared. I had taken an extra day of vacation, so when I returned in mid-afternoon you were at work. While carrying the luggage through the kitchen I blinked in surprise. On the kitchen table was a dozen roses and a card with my name on it. My heart pounding, I took the luggage into my room, then returned and opened the card. It said, "I missed you so while you were gone. It seems that I do love you, and want to take the risk and see if we can make a relationship. If you agree, why don't you be in my bed when I get home and we'll take it from there." I had to sit down, so startling was the realization of my dreams. Opening the folding louvered door into your room, I saw that it was as neat as you usually keep it, but there were unlit candles all over the room and two champagne glasses on table by the bed next to a box of condoms. I smiled and thought of what to add to the scene, and soon returned from the store with a box of surgical gloves and pint of strawberries. Since I had some time before you returned, I unpacked, cleaned my room a little, and took a long, relaxing bath with lavender crystals. The bath left me relaxed and calm, and I prepared the strawberries and arranged them to look nice. They went into the refrigerator next to the bottle of champagne. Soon you would be home. I looked at my teddies and decided against them. If there were future days of loving they would be fun, but this first time I would go to you with my body as naked and vulnerable as my heart. After lighting some jasmine incense and making sure the lighter was in easy reach, I turned down the bed, heart pounding again, and slid into the middle. Pulling the covers up to my waist, I was as ready as I was going to be. The candles were lit a few minutes before you normally got home. Your car pulled into the carport. The door opened and I heard every footstep as you came back to the room. Your door opened, and I saw you, looking a bit tired and quite nervous. We had trouble meeting each other's eyes. After a moment we succeeded and your eyes softened. You said, "Give me a few minutes to freshen up." I smiled in reply. From the bathroom came sounds of unzipping and splashing water. In a few moments you returned, in the same state of undress as myself. I smiled and held the covers back, and you got into the bed beside me. We moved into an embrace, and did nothing more than hold each other for a few minutes, reveling in the feel of skin against skin, breasts against chest. Our eyes locked, and I saw that, after all the time of coolness, it was now as real for you as for me, that your soul was as open to me as mine to you. I moved my hand to caress your cheek, and our lips brushed gently. We kissed again, moving slowly to a deep kiss, tongues entwined. My eyes closed as I gave myself up to the sensations, but tears slid down my cheeks. I felt your thumb wipe one away, and opened my eyes to see a questioning, sad look in your soft eyes. How could I explain to you that the pain of the past, the years of holding back my feelings, merged in this moment with the hopes (and yes, still some fears) for the future, that all of these feelings were poised on the knife blade of the present, heightened by the stirrings of the body? So I smiled and said, "I'm just happy to be here with you" and changed the mood by tickling you. You moved convulsively and we banged foreheads. I said, "OK, OK, I swear -- no more tickling, ever, on pain of, well, pain." You gave an exaggerated sigh of relief and bent back into the kiss. At the same moment, our hands started moving on each other's bodies, caressing. My nipples were getting harder against your chest and I could feel your cock hardening against my leg. I took it into my hands, then my mouth. My tongue probed into the opening, then ran up and down the shaft. I sucked your cock, then your balls. When you were hard, I opened a condom and rolled it down your rod. I looked back in your eyes and said, "We have all night for foreplay and afterplay and in-between play. Right now I want you inside of me." You smiled and said, "I want to be there." So I rolled onto my back and pulled you into the missionary position. You grumbled about that, saying, "Missionary work is against my religion", but you went along and pulled me into a deep kiss at the moment your first thrust entered me. I cried out in joy and locked my legs behind you and stopped you long enough to put my hands on your cheeks and whisper, "Welcome". With a twinkle in your eyes you said, "Not yet!" and thrust into me again. Our fucking built to a mutual climax within a few minutes. We disengaged for a moment, long enough for you to remove the condom and then went back to caressing and kissing, each learning about the other's body. I turned you onto your stomach and started kissing and stroking your smooth back. Slowly I worked down until I was cupping and kneading your firm ass cheeks. I pulled on one of the surgical gloves and put a little K-Y on the index and middle fingers. I stroked your ass cheeks and was rewarded when you pulled your ass higher up and I started playing with the hole, moving my finger across it, then putting just the tip inside. Slowly I worked one finger in, then two, moving them faster and faster. With my other hand I was jerking on your cock. When you were fully hard again, we changed so that you were doing to me what I had just been doing to you. Soon you put on another condom, added extra K-Y and sensuously spread more on my asshole. Slowly and carefully you started entering me there. Each thrust brought me closer to orgasm, especially when your fingers moved to my clit. This time the fucking lasted longer, though I had two or three orgasms by the time you came. We collapsed in a slick, sweaty heap, and cuddled and kissed until we fell asleep for a while. I awoke to your tongue moving over my body, sucking on one nipple while caressing the other. You worked down until your mouth sucked my clit, sending electric shocks from nipples to toes. Your tongue started flicking from one side of my clit to the other until I exploded in massive orgasm. Thus we passed the night, sleeping until one of us awoke and started playing with the other. We learned every inch of the each other's bodies, and went from woman on top to doggy to something for which I don't know the name. You came five times and I lost count. In between we fed each other champagne and strawberries. As the dawn came up, we kissed and each said "I love you". You fell asleep, and so did I shortly, but first I took the time to contemplate a future brighter than any I had known, and to be grateful for this one night when I loved and was loved in return. Blessings to you, my darling one.