Archive-name: Miscell/flampass.txt Archive-author: Standby Archive-title: Flames of Passion, The WARNING This article contains sexual situations between consenting adults. If this pisses you off, don't look. It also mocks the selected groups of idiots who don't bother to fully read posts and send boring and insulting email (as befits their miniscule minds). If this bothers you, you should probably not read this. If you are one of the pea-brains who are being mocked, I fervently hope this bugs the shit out of you. DISCLAIMER This story is false. If you feel insulted by it, I was probably aiming at you. I was sitting at my terminal with Julie. Julie's my cohort in crime, often putting in long hours with me on those terminally late projects. She's a real looker, too, IMHO -- slim, long brown hair, dark eyes, very pretty, and a body that is to die for. We were working late one night on a paper that absitively, posilutely had to be done by the next day. By 9PM, everyone else had gone home. By 10, we were feeling silly. But by 11, it was going well, so we felt little guilt in opening up a window and scanning though the net, seeing what was new and news. We scanned the usual comp.* groups and moved onto the alt.sex hierarchy. As usual when we were doing this, Julie was horny as hell, and would do her best to distract me. In this case, she started out by nibbling on my ear and running her hands up and down the inside of my thigh. "Shit, willya look at that!" "What's the problem, Standby?" Her hand was perilously close to the rising bulge in my jeans. "Some twits are bitching about a message I put onto the net!" "Oh?" she breathed into my ear as her hand started working the zipper. "What did you post?" "I was just complaining about the signal-to-noise ratio of alt.sex.stories and how most of the posted stories are about mutilation and rape and kiddy-porn." Julie pulled my cock out of my pants. Her hot little hand started rubbing it gently as she unbottoned her blouse with the other. She batter her big brown eyes at me and said, "But don't those stories belong here?" "Of course they do," I replied, helping her out of her bra. "I never said that they didn't. But these pinheads assumed that because I wanted to see more good old-fashioned fucking and sucking here, I didn't want them to be able to post their hack- and-slash rapefests." Julie bent down and started licking my dick. In between licks she asked, in her sexiest voice, "You mean just because you aren't turn on by autopsies they think you're being censorious?" "Worse than that," I replied as Julie began to deep- throat my dick. "They assume I don't know how to skip an article when I don't want to waste my time reading it. And I get twits telling me that I should take my self-rightousness elsewhere!" Julies hand crept down to her pussy. She started to gently massage herself as my cock disappeared into her mouth. She grunted something at me. "No," I replied, "It's not really that bad. Then again, there was some brain-dead fool who complains because I posted via an anonymous server!" Julie stopped sucking my cock looked at me. "But, we don't have any other way to post net.news here. Besides, we'd take too much shit for posting to this if the suits got pissed." She gave a quick suck and went on. "Are you telling me that they're all twits?" She went back to her mouth action. "Oh, no, hardly. This is a raging discussion that crops up from time to time. I even got one intelligent comment from someone, suggesting that comments should perhaps go to alt.sex.stories.d." Julie started to run her tongue directly over the head of my dick. I started pumping my cock forward, fucking her mouth faster and faster, until a spurt of cum shout out. Julie lapped it down eagerly. As she was licking my dripping cock clean, I said, "The biggest idiots were probably the ones telling me to grow up because that stuff belong on a.s.s, as if I couldn't tell that." "Oh, for shit's sake, that's silly." Julie got up on the desk in front of me and spread her legs. She fingered her cunt for a moment, and then pulled my head towards her snatch. I immediately started licking her twat, letting her tangy juices drip onto my tongue. I started working a finger up into her pussy. "Don't they ban children from a.s.s.?" I shook my head, to busy enjoying the taste of her cunt to speak. "You'd think that people on the net would be intelligent enough to not bother with that crap," she went on, beginning to pump her hips into my face. I responded by fucking her with my tongue. "You didn't tell them not to post whatever they want, you didn't even call them sick or disgusting, and you get email and posts from them about this." Julie suddenly stopped and grapped my head. With a moan, she began to shake, until a massive orgasm shook her entire body. She smiled and moved a strand of hair off her face. "So what will you do?" "Oh, I'll probably ignore them from now on...it's not like they're worth my time to get pissed or anything. They're mostly at about the 6 year old level, I'm sure. I mean, how can you take seriously someone who sends all-caps email saying 'UR AN ASSHOLE AND U HAVE NO SEX LIFE!" "Not seriously at all, eh?" She started stroking my cock with a handful of vaseline. It responded by standing up straight and stiff in her hand. She handed me the tube and turned, bending over the desk. I began rubbing ample amounts of the white petroleum jelly in and around her puckered anus. I placed the head of my stiff cock at her asshole and slowly pushed forward. "Right, not at all. Especially the ones who post bandwidth wasting messages about how I'm wasting bandwidth with a 3-line comment." "So you're posting this particular comment as a story?" Julie sighed as my cock slid in and out of her tight asshole and reached down to finger her pussy. "Exactly," I panted, beginning to thrust harder, "This is a _story_, it has _sex_, and it says what I want it to say." "Unghhhh...but aren't you worried about more insulting email from this essentially juvenile approach?" "Do you really think this is juvenile?" I was fast approaching another orgasm, and I started pushing my cock deeply into Julie's asshole and holding it there, wanting to flood her bowels with my sperm. "What does that say about the people who will undoubtedly post public messages condemning me and sending poorly written and insulting flames to my via the server?" "Shit! Harder!" Julie screamed and came. Her entire body went ballististic with orgasm, with major shaking going on in her twat and asshole. "I think it says that they probably have no sense of humor and very little self image if they can be really pissed by a suggestion that there should be more sex in the group." The contractions in Julie's asshole brought on my own orgasm. I thrust deeply into her ass and began to shoot spurt after spurt of hot cum into her. "Not only that," I said, "But I think it goes to the core of whether this should be alt.SEX.stories or alt.sex.STORIES or alt.SEX.STORIES." I pulled my depleted prick from Julie's dilated asshole and kissed her. "I know which one YOU want," she grinned. "And besides, flames and insults, especially the poorly written ones, just get routed to /dev/null and ignored." "Damn straight," I said. --